Single Reviews Diary 22 – 2nd July 2010

Again, I’ll have to apologise for my lateness with this one – the twenty-second edition of my Single Reviews Diaries. So this week is actually the week of my 19th birthday and the singles are actually rather interesting. It wasn’t hard to pick my Track Of The Week and Stinker Of The Week because not only are they the best and worst songs of the week but probably the best and worst songs of the WHOLE ENTIRE YEAR. 3 is a magic number and magic begins with the letter M so it’s also intriguing to see that two artists, both beginning with M have released three promo singles each for our listening pleasure. So yep, it’s a peculiar week. Read my reviews below and give me comments and opinions on what you think of this week’s selection.

Single Reviews Diary 22 – 2nd July 2010:

01. 3OH!3 featuring Ke$ha: My First Kiss

3OH!3 - My First Kiss
Eurrgh! These 3OH!3 losers had me guiltily singing along to
Don’t Trust Me andStarstrukk featuring Katy Perry but at least I could admit to myself despite the guys’ obvious stupidity, there were some pop smarts underneath the tripe. Not with this – the lead single from their sophomore album Streets Of Gold. Following off the back of their last Ke$ha collaboration Blah Blah Blah, My First Kiss is just completely dumb. Starting off with a shouty “My first kiss went a little like this” followed by kissing effects, the song continues in the same annoying manner with the boys shouting tunelessly over a cascade of guitars and synths. Ke$ha’s role is pointless, only providing a brief female slant to the track and to attract some additional star power. Sure, this will make all the sweaty pre-pubescents at the teenage disco go crazy but for anyone who has moved well beyond their first kiss, this is pop at its dumbest and most senseless. And clearly 3OH!3 are becoming one trick ponies – using silly sound effects in order to sell their songs seems to be their thing. Plus the blond one (not Ke$ha) comes across totally desperate for attention in the accompanying video. I’ll give it half a point extra for the oooh-oooh hook though. 1.5 STARS

02. Ash: Instinct

Ash - Instinct: 7-inch + Download: £5.00 packshot


Single Letter T (we’re finally getting to the end of them) is a decent pop rock tune with a huge electro influence. It’s perfectly enjoyable radio fodder (not that it will get the airplay) but doesn’t boast any sizeable hook or anything really special. A pleasant listen with a nice long guitar solo towards the end.
3 STARS

03. Bombay Bicycle Club: Ivy And Gold

Bombay Bicycle Club - Ivy & Gold / Flaws
Quirky rockers Bombay Bicycle Club are yet another band with a single that recalls sunshine and school’s out. This has a very folky sound which is pleasant to listen to but I’m constantly reminded of Mumford & Sons. Decent but BBC probably need to broaden their sound out a bit more.
3 STARS

04. Cathy Davey: Army Of Tears


The extremely talented singer songwriter that is Cathy Davey has returned with the second single from her brilliant new album
The Nameless. Amidst marching band beats, ominous guitar and banjo and dramatic strings, Cathy manages once again to take the listener away from their own World and into her own otherworldly one with her soft, endearing vocals. Another excellent single, surely international success beckons. 4 STARS

05. Ciara featuring Ludacris: Ride

Ciara - Ride
Following an underwhelming foray into pop with her last album
Fantasy Ride, the Queen of Crunk Ciara returns to her raunchy roots from her first album with forthcoming fourth album, the aptly titled Basic Instinct. This song seems to be doing relatively well in her native US. Despite the sexual but “nothing new in this day and age” music video being banned in many territories, the song has cracked the US Top 50 and hit the Top 5 on the US R&B/Hip-Hop charts so clearly many urban fans have welcomed back the old Ciara. I enjoy urban music myself but this is a pretty poor comeback single. Ludacris shows up for his fifth CiCi collaboration but really this guy will rap on anything these days! He spends most of the time talking in the robot from Boom Boom Pow’s voice while Ciara croons in the only way she knows how…soft and breathy which sounds sexy alright but shows how limited her vocal range. With a title called Ride, this is clearly a bedroom jam but it’s a very run-of-the-mill bedroom jam rather than a hot steamy one. Maybe on Ciara and Ludacris’ sixth collaboration, they might surprise us? 2 STARS

06. Eliza Doolittle featuring Lloyd Wade: Pack Up

Eliza Doolittle - Pack Up
I think Eliza Doolittle is an awfully contrived singer – one of those ‘kooky’ singer-songwriter types who writes chirpy indie tracks, their bubbly vocals just perfect for the next Apple ad. That’s exactly what Eliza is on this single – chirpy. She even “tweets” halfway through the song. Not actually tweet as in write short messages on Twitter but actually imitates a bird. However, I can’t deny the catchy Summery draw of this track and the fact that Ms. Doolittle thinks outside the box a little by sampling an old World War I tune originally sang by George Asaf. Her friend Lloyd Wade gives a positive and raspy vocals work as a good catalyst to Doolittle’s “love it or hate it” singing voice. I think for this, Doolittle deserves a chance at the Top 20.
3.5 STARS

TRACK OF THE WEEK!
07. Florence + The Machine: Cosmic Love

Florence + The Machine - Cosmic Love
This track continues to give me goosebumps everytime I listen to it, even a year on from first hearing it. One could compare it to
Dog Days Are Over as it has that same Florence structure – starting off all subdued with quiet vocals and tinkling harps before exploding into a flood of heavenly vocals, tribal drumbeats and bombastic production. However, while Dog Days is a great track – it feels more like the type of song you’d dance along to at a festival. It has a real joyous celebratory feel but it never feels extraordinary – at least I don’t think so anyway. Cosmic Love has an ethereal feel to it – like it comes from another planet! Florence sounds like some otherworldly spectre as she bellows out this explosive, romantic tune with a Celtic lilt. The production matches the epic vocals and lyrics perfectly and the oooh-ooohs are beautifully haunting. When Florence hits those two high notes towards the end of song – you realise this song is nothing short of magic. This is without a doubt one of the most underappreciated mainstream releases of our time and it baffles me that it was picked as the seventh single from the album. 5 STARS

08. Foals: Miami

Foals - Miami
Following on from the brilliant
This Orient, the alternative rockers return with a song so sweaty and muscular, it matches the accompanying video to perfection. To be honest, I find this track a little lacking. Despite some funky guitar work, it’s all a bit too plodding and doesn’t pack much bite or promise. The vocals are background noise and the song should have ended 2 minutes earlier than it does. I would definitely check out there other stuff though because, unlike this, it sounds like anything but album filler. 2 STARS

09. Ham Sandwich: The Naturist


The talented band with an unfortunate name return with this soft sing-along track from their upcoming second album Natural Causes. It’s a lot softer than what we’re used to from the group with Niamh Farrel, the band’s frontwoman, packing in lots of angst and vulnerability into this acoustic track which lyrically could be compared to Robyn’s
Dancing On My Own. Irish radio needs to start playing this. 4 STARS

10. Kelis: 4th Of July (Fireworks)


I do believe I said over on the review for this song that I didn’t like this track much but I’m glad I gave it a few more listens before I reviewed it. Because
4th Of July is clearly a grower. It doesn’t have any real discernible hook but Kelis sounds like a lost ‘90s dance diva on this well produced, squelchy house track, yet another lyrical ode to her son Knight. Tying in with the American holiday, this has a misleading euphoric feel – and while it doesn’t quite reach the standards of Acapella – Kelis shows that you can jump on the dance bandwagon without sounding like everyone else out there. 4 STARS

11. Kevin Rudolf featuring Jay Sean, Lil’ Wayne and Birdman: I Made It (Cash Money Heroes)

Kevin Rudolf / Lil Wayne / Jay Sean / Birdman - I Made It (Cash Money Heroes) (Edited Version)
One hit wonder Kevin Rudolf returns with another catchy urban pop rock tune which features old cohort, the incarcerated Lil’ Wayne, pointless music video cameo staple Birdman and US flavour of the month Jay Sean. The track has an upbeat anthemic feel, no doubt helped by Sean’s smooth vocals, and is sort of likeable but is unoriginal with some clichéd and tired lyrics about artists getting to the top. Sorry guys, B.o.B. did it better.
3 STARS

12. Janelle Monáe featuring Big Boi: Tightrope

Janelle Monáe - Tightrope [feat. Big Boi]
Janelle is definitely going to be the next big global star. And well deserved…rather than posing as an oversexed avant garde artist, Monáe is a good old fashioned funky soul babe, dressed in an androgynous suit who sings at a rapid pace amongst some toe-tapping production of guitars, drumbeats and rhythmic trumpets. As much as I enjoy Big Boi for his innovative approach to hip-hop music, his appearance on this track is not worthwhile at all. That being said, Monáe is very special indeed and all eyes are on her to see what she’ll bring out next.
4 STARS

STINKER OF THE WEEK!
13. JLS: The Club Is Alive

JLS - The Club Is Alive
Complete garbage. I don’t care how many hooks this track has, I don’t care how hard JLS have worked, I don’t care how club friendly this track is and I don’t care that many teenage girls will be wetting their panties over how many times JLS pout moodily into the camera or flash their abs. We have enough bland, generic and Auto-Tuned electropop in the charts at the minute – JLS use this template but add some cringeworthy and clichéd lyrics on top of that and their voices remain indistinguishable from each other due to the Auto-Tune “effect”.
”Went to the club, not looking for love”. Who goes to a club looking for love? People go the club for cheap, drunken sex.You can be the DJ, I can be the dancefloor, you can get up on me!” Excuse me while I vomit. ”Shawties all around but I’m focused on you!” Puh-lease you are not gangsta enough to throw the word shawty around – even if Justin Bieber uses it. And good luck, Aston finding a shawty shawter than you. So yup, The Club Is Alive is just a soulless cash-in record to appeal to the teenyboppers who are, no doubt, fuelling this whole generic, soulless electro craze. I know that manufactured acts have been around before but JLS make me so mad because they’re clearly squandering the talent they have for the floods of cash they’ll get in return. There’s nothing wrong with a fun dance track but The Club Is Alive just screams “GIVE ME MONEY!” and nothing more…which is really sad. 1 STAR

14. Lee Ryan: I Am Who I Am

Lee Ryan - I Am Who I Am
After the terribly generic
Secret Love which is being released officially this week, as a double A-side Blue band member Lee Ryan is releasing a ballad. Now I think of Mr. Ryan as being a less desperate male equivalent to Katie Price/Jordan but I have to say I’m surprisingly bolwed over by this heartfelt ballad. Maybe Ryan has a bit of musicality underneath his reality TV friendly body. Beautifully sang, some great lyrics and rousing yet lonely production, this is cream of the crop as far as male pop ballads go. Lee has managed to top Take That at this feat but it’s certainly opened my eyes to the fact that the guy might have talent after all. 4 STARS

15. M.I.A.: Steppin’ Up


And so the onslaught of promo singles begins. M.I.A.’S new album
/\/\/\Y/\ is out next week and alongside buzz single Born Free and the brilliant lead single XXXO we get three taster tracks from the new record. Steppin’ Up reintroduces us to the noisy and busy tracks by M.I.A.. Opening up with incredibly loud and crunchy drill noises amongst a tuneless vocal flow of “Rub-a-dub-dub”, the song isn’t for casual M.I.A. fans. However, once you get passed all the noise, you’ve actually got a gem of a chorus/hook? Basically it’s filled with nonchalant expletives but it has a futuristic paranoia about it that’s just going to fit in perfectly with the album theme and sounds like a good alternative dance track if it gets airplay in the clubs. 3.5 STARS

16. M.I.A.: Teqkilla (sorry no video…yet! Will update!)


I’ve actually just discovered that there’s a remix of this song featuring Nicki Minaj. Jeez, is there anything Nicki isn’t appearing on these days, let alone alternative artists like M.I.A.. Teqkilla is similarly as noisy as
Steppin’ Up but is definitely made for the clubs and raves. Full of loud and noisy techno effects and a trippy production, the song doesn’t have much to say apart from being incredibly infectious. A definite return to the sound of first album Arular. 4 STARS

17. M.I.A.: Tell Me Why (sorry no video…yet! Will update!)


The final promo single from
/\/\/\Y/\, this is definitely more mainstream. Starting off with a rushed intro, this Diplo produced jam quickly descends into a much calmer sound. M.I.A. sings/raps in a slower relaxed voice against a simple yet rhythmic military beat. This could be the second official single from the album. 3.5 STARS

18. MGMT: Siberian Breaks

File:Siberian breaks single.JPG
MGMT might have promised to release zero singles from their second album
Congratulations but clearly that doesn’t apply to promotional singles. Following on from first promo single Flash Delirium, Siberian Breaks is a 12 minute lesson in overindulgent, schizophrenia in music. Frontman Andrew VanWyngarden says that Siberian Breaks is like 8 songs strung together, all lyrically speaking about surfing across the Arctic Circle (as evidenced in the Congratulations cover) and he certainly isn’t wrong. While the track is actually rather great – a psychedelic homage to Beatles-esque pop, albeit with many changes in tempo and instrumentation, it would have been better if the group just split the whole track into several different songs rather than trying to be all “hipster”. Quantity is sometimes as important as quality in music. 3 STARS

19. MGMT: It’s Working

Another psychedelic track from the boys, the opening track from Congratulations is probably one of the more poppier numbers on the album, but nothing in comparison toElectric Feel or Kids. Again, I’m strongly reminded of The Beatles as this has a similar instrumentation of harpsichords, guitars and heavy drumbeats. 3.5 STARS

20. MGMT: Congratulations


This is one of the greater tracks from the album. The title track and album closer is a really laidback, sort of Summery track with watery piano chords, quiet and poetic vocals from Andrew and lightly strum guitars. Definitely the most radio-friendly track on the album.
4 STARS

21. Miike Snow: The Rabbit


The fantastic Swedes that are Miike Snow are back with this glam stomper. This is definitely one of the more commercial tracks on the album and sounds like a less manufactured Adam Lambert track with more intriguing lyrics and some better electro production. I hope radio picks this one up.
3.5 STARS

22. The Muppets: Popcorn

The Muppets - Popcorn
Yup, Kermit The Frog, Miss Piggy and co. are back with their own cover of the easily recognisable instrumental
Popcorn composed by Gershon Kingsley back in 1969. Really this barely differs from the instrumental; it’s all about watching the music video for all its novelty fun. 2 STARS

23. Nathan featuring Flo Rida: Caught Me Slippin’


British R&B singer Nathan returns with a new song which has a sort of old fashioned Summer feel to it, a bit like R. Kelly’s
Ignition but not anywhere near as good. This song just doesn’t really go anywhere. Bar the certain old skool urban charm underlying, this is nearly as generic as they come. Nathan doesn’t show much of his vocal chops off, the lyrics are tired and clichéd, there are no strong hooks and the song opens with an annoying J.R. Rotem siren. It’s surprisingly Flo Rida who steals the show here with his rapping flowing perfectly with the song. But when Flo Rida’s the standout in your song with a disposable rap, I think that means it’s time to go back to the drawing board. 2 STARS

24. Peggy Sue: Yo Mama

Peggy Sue - Yo Mama
The folky Amy Winehouse returns with another single featuring folky instrumentals and Amy Winehouse-esque vocals. It’s a rousing track with some lovely use of accordions but doesn’t sound especially different or likely to blow you away. As I’ve said for previous single
Watchmen though, Peggy Sue shows lots of promise as an artist. 3 STARS

25. Primary 1: Princess

Princess
This has a part naff ‘80s sound and also little parts that have an experimental edge. I shouldn’t like this track but I do. There’s something very listenable about it. The video is also excellent and I recommend you watch.
3 STARS

26. Wiley featuring Jodie Connor and J2K: Electric Boogaloo (Find A Way)

Electric Boogaloo
Sorry Wiley, but Dizzee Rascal did it first. Yet another grimy track desperate for crossover success, Jodie Connor seems to be building a reputation for singing poppy hooks over rap tracks. I will give it a decent-ish score for having a Summery club feel, a decent hook and for being mercifully short though.
2.5 STARS

Singles Reviews Diary 7 – 19th March 2010

Okay single reviews for this week are all a little blah. Nothing amazing yet nothing awful either. Here we are, third time’s the charm.

Singles Reviews Diary 7 – 19th March 2010:

01. 12 Stone Toddler: This Suit
I actually decided to review this track because clinically obese toddlers make me LOL! I wasn’t expecting this song to be so good though. Like nothing on the radio at the moment, this fun bouncy song is like a grandson of Madness’ House Of Fun. Really enjoyable stuff.
4.5 STARS

02. 50 Cent featuring Governor: Do You Think About Me
After hassling Kelly Rowland to have his babies on terrible last single
Baby By Me, 50 redeems himself somewhat with this subdued rap track that sees him acting all vulnerable and such. With chipmunk backing vocals, this sounds like a less irritating version of Ironik’s Stay With Me. Fiddy has clearly lost it though ‘cause this is no In Da Club or my personal favourite P.I.M.P.. 2.5 STARS

03. Arctic Monkeys: My Propeller
A decent enough third single from their good but not great album
Humbug. There is a hidden power behind this downbeat track and the last minute in a half of the track sounds like classic Monkeys. 2.5 STARS

04. Audio Bullys: Only Man
Not feelin’ this one at all really. I love some of Audio Boys tracks but this is a poor choice of lead single from forthcoming album
Higher Than The Eiffel. Minimal electronica with Britpop is the best way to describe this song. 2 STARS

05. Boy George: Amazing Grace
Sadly this isn’t Boy George doing a cover of the famous hymn. Instead, this is a very ‘90s and very gay friendly dance anthem than many should embrace with open arms but it’s really not my cup of tea. Give me
Karma Chameleon anyday. 3 STARS

06. Classical Artists For Haiti: The Prayer
Yet another Haiti charity single. I’m all for the support the country’s being getting but were there this many charity events for the likes of the Tsunami, Katrina and Africa. Anyways, all of the top classical musicians such as Paul Potts, Natasha Marsh, Faryl, The Priests, Rhydian Roberts and…um…Darius gather together to bring us this rather pleasant classical track. Glad it isn’t all overblown and melodramatic and not too depressing either. It does sound like it should be soundtracking some Disney film though.
4 STARS

07. Fionn Regan: Catacombs
The Irish singer-songwriter sounds like a young Neil Young (pardon the pun!) on this retro little number. Can definitely see this one becoming a grower after a few more listens.
3 STARS

08. Florence + The Machine: Dog Days Are Over
A pointless re-release as everyone’s heard this song and its since firmly become ingrained in European culture with all the times its been heard on TV and radio. Unless you’ve been living under a rock in the Gobi Desert with earplugs in, curled up in a ball, it’s likely you’ve heard this. Not to say its bad as I would consider it one of Florence + The Machine’s signature songs starting off all soft with tinkling harps before exploding in a cascade of percussion, handclaps and Florence’s celebratory, heavenly chorus. Now hurry up and release
Cosmic Love I tell you…before it’s too late! 4 STARS

09. Glee Cast: Jump
The rock snob inside of me wants to sneer at Glee covering the Van Halen classic but in fairness this song is just perfect for them. With that joyous shouty chorus and those hyperactive synths, the Glee Cast completely shine on this track. Probably one of the best songs form the series so far. It made me go off and re-download the original anyway.
4.5 STARS

10. Glee Cast: Smile
Glee produce an Americanised version of Lily Allen’s debut single and breakout hit. Hot Social Outcast Girl does a good job of making the song her own but it’s completely ruined by Tall Jock Guy’s unnecessary and constipated backing vocals.
3.5 STARS

11. Glee Cast: Smile
Another
Smile that Glee cover in this episode is the classic ballad written by Charlie Chaplin. Love this, but any version of Smile sang by a competent singer always gets me secretly teary eyed. But shhhhh! Don’t tell anyone. 4 STARS

STINKER OF THE WEEK!
12. Inna: Hot
More Eurodance trash that’s only listenable when you’re off your face in a club. Why is Inna charting so well? What is she doing that’s so different from all the latest flops by Velvet or September?!
1 STAR

13. Favourites: Cheltenham (Downtown)
II don’t know what to make of this charity single for *dun dun dun* Haiti. It basically sounds like Petula Clark’s
Downtown with the word ‘downtown’ being replaced by Cheltenham (a famous horse racing course in Ireland) sang by some unknown Irish singer Laura Cretchley and a bunch of random sporting pundits on backing vocals. So cringeworthy yet so good. Let’s make it an international hit! 4 STARS

14. Mr. Hudson featuring Kanye West: Anyone But Him
After failing to replicate the success of the infectious and sure to be pop classic
Supernova, Mr. Hudson plays it safe by teaming up with Kanye West again. Sadly this second offering from the pair doesn’t live up and should of just stayed on the album. A mid-tempo minimalist electro track that doesn’t really go anywhere. Mr. H. wails in Auto-Tune about how some girl picked Kanye over him. At least, Kanye responds to Hudson’s singing rather than blabbing on about something completely out of sync with the subject of the song like the majority of guest rappers. Kanye also uses the killer line “Once you go black, you never goes back”. 1 STAR

15. Peggy Sue: Watchmen
I’m liking this girl. She sounds like a folky Amy Winehouse on this track. Hopefully, she gets herself a major record deal soon.
3 STARS

16. Stornoway: I Saw You Blink
A really good acoustic mid-tempo from the Oxford band. As Harry has said, these guys sound very much like Mumford & Sons. Hey, maybe folky tracks like this will replace electropop as the hot new sound.
3.5 STARS

17. Tiësto featuring Nelly Furtado: Who Wants To Be Alone
Tiësto must fancy himself as the new David Guetta as he works with more and more mainstream artists lately. I know I’d listen to Tiësto over Guetta anyday. This is a great club friendly trance track featuring the versatile Nelly Furtado on singing duties. I love Furtado’s vocals on this track, it sounds like how she sang on her Spanish album
Mi Planyet this is in English. Perhaps not Tiësto’s best work ever but I think I’m gonna check out his Kaleidoscope album and can’t wait for Nelly’s album Lifestyle due out this Summer. 3.5 STARS

18. Usher featuring will.i.am.: OMG
A really poor lead single from Usher’s new album. I’m so sick of will.i.am. recycling beats from
The E.N.D. and putting them on other artists’ albums. This sounds like an E.N.D. B-side with Usher’s trademark croon drowned in deadpan Auto-Tune and a bizarre football chant running through the verses. Perhaps this will grow on me but I miss the Usher who used to deliver flawless pop/R&B songs like Yeah! and Caught Up. Luckily there are much better songs on Usher’s forthcoming Raymond Vs. Raymond but this is a poor first offer to the international market. 1.5 STARS

TRACK OF THE WEEK!
19. Young Artists For Haiti: Wavin’ Flag
Canada’s finest artists such as Nelly Furtado, Drake, Avril Lavigne and the mighty Justin Bieber gather together to record this surprisingly enjoyable Haitian charity single. Unlike the hot mess that was
We Are The World 25, this original song is anthemic, inspirational and globally reaching. It’s actually the best charity single I’ve heard since the original Band Aid’s Feed The World, that’s how good it is. 5 STARS

20. We Have Band: Divisive
This is a fabulous piece of synthpop, not Owl City and Lady GaGa style synthpop, a much more alternative sounding form of synthpop like Human League.
4 STARS

21. Wild Beasts: We Still Got The Taste Dancin’ On Our Tongues
Love this one actually. Sounds very fresh and original. Although I’d imagine Hayden Thorpe’s falsetto would get on my nerves if this track were overplayed. Thankfully, this is unlikely to happen. Definitely (legally) downloading their album
Two Dancers though ’cause I’m liking what I’m hearing. 4 STARS

Phew! Finally done successfully. As usual, give me feedback and tell me what you think of this week’s singles. 😀