Singles Reviews Diary 8 – 26th March 2010


Okay, I’m doubtful you people are that excited about my Singles Reviews Diary (its 8 weeks old now by the way) so I’ll just get on with it.

Singles Reviews Diary 8 – 26th March 2010

01. 30 Seconds To Mars: This Is War

Your typical US ‘epic’ rock song. Personally I love this sort of thing but not everyone will lap up the Jared Leto fronted band’s brand of rock with soaring, angst ridden vocals and heavy power chords. It’s a strong second single from the album of the same name though. Also doubles up as the lead single from new video game Dragon Age: Origins.

02. Alex Gardner: I’m Not Mad
Xenomania might be best known for crafting pop hits for girlbands such as Girls Aloud and Sugababes but here they’ve taken time out to work with the newest UK male solo artist to bring something slightly more alternative to the table. Alex Gardner can best be described as a Scottish Erik Hassle. Much like Hassle’s work, this electropop track is brooding and angsty and probably not everyone’s cup of tea. Gardner has a good voice for his 19 years though and he’s sure to gain a legion of female fans due to looking very like a certain Mr. Rob Pattinson.

03. Ash: War With Me
Just to inform you all that Ash have now released the 13th single from their forthcoming singles format series
A-Z Series. This track is a cheery little love song but nothing they, or any other band, have never done before…a thousand times before. 4 STARS

04. Corrine Bailey Rae: Paris Nights/New York Mornings
I’m glad to see that Corrine’s album
The Sea is not full of downbeat material after the death of her husband. This is a beautiful, light little number with Corrine’s distinctive vocals being as charming as ever. It’s no Put Your Records On but it’s still incredibly enjoyable. 4 STARS

05. Crystal Swing: He Drinks Tequila
Maybe this doesn’t deserve the Stinker Of The Week award, I would have given it to the Gummy Bears track below but it’s far too easy to knock novelty singles so this gets it instead. The song was featured on The Ellen DeGeneres St. Patrick’s Day show and their basically the newest YouTube sensations. But the thing is, this song is completely naff. Comprised of a mother, son and daughter…this is a cringeworthy country and western song that can basically be heard by drunken locals in any pub in Ireland. Good voices and good performers they may be but I really just cannot get over how bad this is.

06. The Drums: Best Friend
The ever brilliant Drums return with this new single. On their website, The Drums have said they only write about two types of feelings, “one is the first day of summer when you and all of your friends are standing on the edge of a cliff watching the sun set and being overcome with all of your hopes and dreams at once. The other is when you’re walking alone in the rain and realize you will be alone forever.” This song appears to be about the former feeling. Anyway, I recommend you all get downloading on this song as it borrows lots of elements from the 1960s – good old classic rock ‘n’ roll.

07. Glee Cast: And I’m Telling You I’m Not Going
It’s the last episode of the current series of
Glee *sniff whine wail* and this week we get four singles from the cast and for a while at least the chart will be free of Gleemadness. Jennifer Hudson Junior sounds practically identical to Jennifer Hudson Senior on this track from the Dreamgirls soundtrack. It’s a huge soulful number and I really think J.H.J. (Mercedes, I think that’s her name in the show) really could get a record deal when the show ends. 4 STARS

08. Glee Cast: Don’t Rain On My Parade
The Hot Social Outcast goes all theatrical on this big showtune made most famous by Barbara Streisand. Again I think, the Hot Social Outcast could get a record deal after the show ends, as she really has the most versatile voice out of the whole class and always gives it her all.

09. Glee Cast: You Can’t Always Get What You Want
I know I shouldn’t like their campy cover of Rolling Stones’
You Can’t Always Get You Want but it’s actually sort of amazing. It includes all the cast getting their own solo pieces and I actually think this is my favourite Glee track of the week simply because it’s so uplifting. Brilliant stuff. 5 STARS

10. Glee Cast: My Life Would Suck Without You
This is probably going to be the
Glee song that will chart this week. I still prefer the Kelly Clarkson version but with its huge chorus and lyrics about love and support, it was only matter of time before Glee covered this anyway. 3 STARS

11. Gummibar: The Gummy Bear Song
Like Crazy Frog except it’s a green teddy bear and he’s not exposing his genitalia to the World, this is basically another ridiculous novelty song. Thankfully, I think most people have wisened up to novelty songs and I don’t think this will be hitting the No.1 spot anytime soon. For some reason, Gummy Bear reminds me of Basshunter.

12. HIM: Scared To Death
The Finnish rock band are back with a new single which is actually very enjoyable. Shows plenty of emotion and vulnerability on the track. If you haven’t listened to HIM before, I recommend you give this a listen.

13. Katherine Jenkins: Love Never Dies
The classical opera singer releases the title track from Andrew Lloyd Webber’s new musical. Her voice is heavenly and if you like opera then you’ll like this. Jenkins doesn’t sound much different from any other classical artist though. Probably the fact that she’s young and blonde and pretty is why she’s so successful at the minute.

14. Keri Hilson: I Like
This one doesn’t seem to be getting any airplay on the music channels or on the radio. Which is a shame. Because this is Keri’s finest solo single yet and there’s not a Lil Wayne, Kanye West or a Ne-Yo to help her out. Originally released as a German only single, this Europoppy number is perfect for the clubs. And it’s not a song about female empowerment or a song about being drunk or being hassled by your telephone. This is a sensual, euphoric type of club track about getting up, close and personal with that special someone. The production is glossy and shiny and Keri’s voice is full of longing. This track is bit like an Americanised R&B version of Ellie Goulding’s
Starry Eyed. I’m hoping it will be a hit. 4 STARS

15. Kids In Glass Houses: Matters At All
A strong lead single from Kids In Glass Houses’ new album
Dirt. I’m liking this a lot more than the new You Me At Six single. Has a great melody and a crowd pleasing chorus. 3.5 STARS

16. Lil’ Jon featuring Kee and Tinchy Stryder: Give It All U Got
Your typical crap rap club track. Lil Jon shouts a lot, Kee is the latest dance diva to warble out an Auto Tuned, catchy chorus and Tinchy provides an alternative to Jon’s shouty raps with his Cockney flow. A catchy enough track, more enjoyable than Flo Rida, but not original at all.

17. Mariah Carey featuring Ne-Yo: Angels Cry
After Mariah’s last album
Memoirs Of An Imperfect Angel flopped hard with no hit singles, it was decided that some of the songs would be remixed and would be put on a remix album known as Angels Advocate. In another bad turn for Mariah, Angels Advocate has been shelved and Mimi is working on a brand new studio album. One of the singles from the remix album is being released this week though and that is Angels Cry, a big teary eyed ballad that been given a little extra help with Ne-Yo’s smooth crooning. Not a bad one at all. I’m no Mariah fan but fans of her older stuff will be happy to know that this is as close as new Mariah (the one who’s fond of acting like a 17 year old girl) will get to being classic Mariah (the big voiced diva of the 1990s). 3 STARS

18. Nneka: Walking
Anyone who can’t wait for M.I.A.’s new album (due out in July) should check out Nneka. The Nigerian hip-hop soul singer releases her single
Walking and it’s absolutely brilliant. It’s got a M.I.A.esque chorus and has a singy rap style that actually manages to sound soulful at the same time. Take that Ke$ha and Uffie. Love it! 5 STARS

19. Ou Est Le Swimming Pool: These New Knights
While their music is good, Ou Est Le Swimming Pool is yet another ‘80s throwback band. This song is another fantastic slice of ‘80s pop but does it have a current place in today’s market. I don’t think so.

20. Plan B: She Said
Absolutely loving this! I know that Plan B has been somewhat successful but if this track goes the right way, Plan B could be as big as Amy Winehouse. And Amy Winehouse isn’t a bad comparison with this song. In fact, it could be compared to the Ghostface Killah remix of
You Know I’m No Good. Singing in falsetto amongst a jazzy backing and finger snaps, Plan B never destroys the sound of this melodic singalong track even when he breaks into his gruff rap. In fact, I love that aspect of the song – the change from singing to rapping. It keeps the song fresh. Plan B is showing us all that there’s still hope for male artists in the music industry. 4 STARS

21. Scouting For Girls: This Ain’t A Love Song
Yes it is actually but that’s not the point. I loved S.F.G.’s
She’s So Luvverly but every song that succeeded that sounded almost the same and I lost interest in the band. Thankfully, they’ve returned with a very strong lead single from new album Everybody Wants To Be On TV. The band have matured a bit with this very catchy power ballad and Roy Stride’s distinctive vocals have a hint of a falsetto to it. Now, the lads have to prove with this new album that they can deliver beyond lead singles.

22. Yeasayer: O.N.E.
A great experimental rock track from the US rockers. A real grower. I love it!

Singles Reviews Diary 5 – 5th March 2010

It’s getting even earlier and earlier…but I have my reviews for singles being released on Monday this week. Cos I’ll most likely be busy. It’s a whopping 37 singles I’ll be covering this week (all though not all of them will be major releases).

Singles Reviews Diary 5 – 5th March 2010

01. A Fine Frenzy: Happier
Better known to her Mom and Dad as Alison Sudol, this gorgeous singer is something like a combination of Colbie Caillat and some anti-folk artist from the
Juno soundtrack. As for Happier, it’s a breezy Summery track with some light breathy vocals. Really like this actually. 4 STARS

02. Agnes: On And On
Poor Agnes. Looks like she’s gonna be a #1 hit wonder after failing to replicate the success of her surprise smash Summer hit
Release Me. This basically sounds like an inferior version of that song. Theres nothing to distinguish this from any songs we’re likely to hear in the Eurovision, only a month and a half away. Yup, ’nuff said. 2 STARS

03. Alicia Keys featuring Drake: Un-thinkable (I’m Ready)
Alicia Keys keeps the momentum going for her
The Element Of Freedom LP with this promotional single. It’s actually a really beautiful song but probably wouldn’t work as an official single. Drake’s harmonies work well with Alicia’s soulful vocals. 3 STARS

04. Avril Lavigne: Alice (Underground)
“IIIIIIIIIIIII….Iiiii’lll get byyyyyyyyyyyy…” yells Avril on the lead single of the Almost Alice soundtrack. Well we certainly won’t Avril as you’re making my ears bleed with your banshee howl. I can’t help thinking this would have been way better in the hands of a more stronger singer like Alanis Morrisette or Amy Lee. However, the thundering percussion and the quiet piano melodies make this just about bearable. 2.5 STARS

Sidenote: What’s the deal with the Almost Alice soundtrack? I mean you think a soundtrack based on a Tim Burton film would be that bit more alternative and gothic sounding. But instead we get 3OH!3, All American Rejects, Owl City and Metro Station — talk about disappointing acts.

05. Bombay Bicycle Club: Evening/Morning
It’s okay and that’s all I have to say. It’s more of an instrumental than a song with vocals. The video disturbs me greatly.

06. Enter Shikari: Tribalism
The clue is in the title – this song is… um well…tribal. Enter Shikari are a hardcore punk band so vicious vocals and loud screaming are to be expected. This isn’t quite as noisy as official single Thumper though. 3 STARS

07. Evanescence: Together Again
Ahead of the release of their new album this Autumn, Evanescence do their bit for Haiti by releasing a B-side of their 2006 album
The Open Door as a charity single. This is a typical Evanescence track…dramatic strings, tinkling pianos, creepy choirs and Amy Lee’s haunted wail. It’s all a bit too melodramatic for a Haiti single but if you’re a fan of the band, I recommend you go out and buy this. 2 STARS

08. Gabriella Cilmi: On A Mission
All my personal (stalkerish) obsessive feelings of love (and lust) for Cilmi aside, this is actually a fantastic tune. It sounds like it came right out of the ’80s and everything from the production to the chorus to the verses and even the cringeworthy rap breakdown in the middle are all amazing. If this is what she’s doing at 18, can you imagine what a fantastic artist she will be in a few years time.

09. Glee Cast: Endless Love
It’s all about the ballads this week on
Glee as the episode these songs are taken from is called ‘Ballad’. A big solid cheesy cover of Diana Ross and Lionel Richie from Hot Social Outcast Girl and The Shoe (Uncool Glee Leader). I actually hope the TV footage is used as a music video for this song ’cause the Shoe’s facial expressions are absolutely hilarious. 3 STARS

10. Glee Cast: I’l Stand By You
The Jock takes the lead with this song. I cringed so much in his soppy cover of The Pretenders/Girls Aloud song/cover.

11. Glee Cast: Don’ Stand So Close To Me/Young Girl
The Shoe does a really good job of this mash-up of songs by The Police and Gary Puckett & The Union. However, this is more episode centric and works better if you see it on TV.

12. Glee Cast: Crush
This actually far surpasses the 1998 original by Jennifer Paige basically ’cause Hot Social Outcast Girl has a much better voice. My favourite
Glee track this week. 3.5 STARS

13. Glee Cast: (You’re) Having My Baby
This is a cover of a song by Paul Anka and Odia Coates. Again, I cringe everytime I hear the Jock sing and I’m kind of annoyed his Pregnant Baby Mama didn’t join him. Still his voice is good enough.

14. Glee Cast: Lean On Me
And this is the big heartwarming ballad that the whole Glee Club come out and sing for the Jock and his Baby Mama. It might bring a tear to some people’s eye but for a heartless cynic like me, I just stare stony faced at the screen when this is sang.

15. Goldfrapp: Rocket
As I’ve said on the Goldfrapp post already, it’s unlikely that they’ll ever surpass their hippyish folky album
Seventh Tree with me. However, Rocket, a synthy, icy mid-tempo ’80s throwback is a quiet grower. I love it. 4 STARS

16. Hadouken!: Mic Check
This is actually amazing. The ravey instrumental for this is worth purchasing alone. If this comes on in a club, I will definitely be first on the dancefloor for this beauty.

17. Hermione Hennessy: Fall At Your Feet
This song is by the British raised daughter of late Irish singer Christie Hennessy. This is actually a really enjoyable song. Might work best for the adult contemporary crowd but this actually sounds like The Corrs.
3.5 STARs

18. Ja Rule featuring R. Kelly: Incredible
Are we seeing the return of classic R&B? I sure hope so. But maybe just ’cause R. Kelly sings the chorus on this track. This takes me back to the early 2000s when R&B was so good and not trashy and generic like it is now. This is all classic piano loops and smooth harmonizing from Kelly. Ja Rule’s pretty good too.

19. Jimi Hendrix: Bleeding Heart
This is classic rock ‘n’ roll from the legendary guitarist. This is very enjoyable but I’m really against the release of posthumous singles and albums. These were all probably demos Hendrix created and didn’t think was good enough for a studio album and now they appear 40 years later after his death (my God, has it been that long)! Will appear on his upcoming album
Valleys Of Neptune. 3.5 STARS

20. John Mayer: Heartbreak Warfare
As much as it pains me to say this, this womanizing racist actually has a lot of talent. Great rock track. Kind of sounds like Coldplay.

21. Kat Deluna featuring Akon: Push Push
She sounds like a combination of Shakira and Rihanna. In other words, she has no originality and needs Akon to help her out on this dancehall R&B track. Unlikely to be a hit. If her brilliant
Run This Show couldn’t make it, then I doubt this will. 2.5 STARS

22. Kid Cudi: Know Why
Poor Cudi looks like he’s fallen into the same trap as fellow intelligent rappers Wale and Lupe Fiasco in that he’s unlikely to see the success of a hit like
Day ‘N’ Nite again. Can’t believe this song will be ignored when crap by Flo Rida and Pitbull will be snapped up by the masses. 4 STARS

23. Lil’ Jon: Get In And Get Out
I like the beat for this but that’s about it! Jeez John, do you actually talk like that in real life.

24. Livvi France: Automatik
After the terrible
Now I’m That Chick, Livvi returns with a rather good club banger. But aren’t we hearing this from everyone in the charts at the moment especially Lady GaGa. Sounds like Just Dance and Poker Face. 2.5 STARS

25. Ludacris featuring Chris Angel: Mindfreak 3 STARS

26. Ludacris featuring Trey Songz: Sex Room 3.5 STARS

27. Ludacris: Sexting 2.5 STARS

^^^^The above three are all promo singles from his Battle Of The Sexes album. It’s a fun album and the songs are all fine but fairly standard run of the mill rap tracks. I love Sexting. I thought I had made that word up myself but obviously not. 😦

28. Monica: Everything To Me
The incredibly soulful Monica makes a nice yet unextraordinary return to the World of music. This is really good but nothing we haven’t heard before.

29. McLean: My Name
Boring. Who is this guy? This sounds like a Taio Cruz B-side. Next!

30. Norah Jones: Stuck
I’m pleasantly surprised. I was expecting another sleepy ballad from Miss Jones but she’s really moving outside the box with this more interesting second single from upcoming album
The Fall. I might check it out if this single is an indication of the new album. 4 STARS

Pixie Lott: Gravity
I really like Pixie and think she’s amazingly talented for her 19 years and think she gets an awful lot of unnecessary abuse. But this song is kind of disgraceful as a single. I haven’t listened to her album
Turn It Up but I’ve heard there’s much better songs on the album like Here We Go Again and Turn It Up. Okay, so it’s not the worst song ever but Pixie sounds like she has a headcold with that nasal singing against the mid-tempo setting. “Gravity, gravity, gravity…” is repeated too many times on the chorus and I don’t like that a deep male voice sings it too. Its just annoying. 1 STAR

32. Robbie Williams: Morning Sun
It’s good but it’s not great. Robbie plays it safe with this so-so ballad. I’d prefer
You Know Me anyday. 2 STARS

33. Sean Garret featuring Plies: Lay U Down
Ah go away, T-Pain impersonators!!!!

34. Shane McGowan & Friends: I Put A Spell On You
This is my favourite Haiti charity record. Really raw and emotive vocals from Shane McGowan, Paloma Faith, Johnny Depp, Bobby Gillespie, Glen Matlock, Chrissie Hynde and Eliza Dolittle. Not sure if a cover of the Screaming Jay Hawkins hit is appropriate in relation to Haiti. But hey! This is a good record people will want to buy instead of feeling obliged to buy.

35. Steve Aoki featuring [[[ Zuper Blahq ]]]: I’m In The House
This sounds suspiciously like Will.I.Am on this novelty dance track which uses the hook “I’m in the house!” for chart success. We all know how crappy Will is solo and over a dance beat, he’s probably worse. This isn’t Will.I.Am. but it sounds identical to him. This is obviously cashing in on the success of Sidney Samson’s
Riverside (Let’s Go!)which this track also sounds like. 2 STARS

36. T-Pain featuring Young Jeezy: Reverse Cowgirl
If you’ve heard one T-Pain track, you’ve heard ’em all. Auto-Tuned drivel.

37. Young Jeezy featuring Plies: Lose My Mind
Much like his collaborator above, if you’ve heard one Young Jeezy song, you’ve heard them all from the gruff voiced rapper. What’s he doing releasing his own solo material. Do what yo do best: being a rent-a-rapper.

That took FOREVER!!! Please feel free to compliment/argue with my reviews!

Singles Reviews Diary 3 – 19th February 2010

Hey guess what?! I’ve come up with my thoughts on singles being released tomorrow a day early. Mightn’t get time to post it tomorrow (have a busy day of drinking for Rag Week tomorrow) so I’ll post it now

Singles Reviews Diary 3 – 19th February 2010:

01. Alicia Keys: Empire State Of Mind (Part II) Broken Down (Video)
Last year, Alicia Keys featured on Jay-Z’s biggest anthem of last year. For new album
The Element Of Freedom, Alicia strips the song down into a beautiful piano ballad while still keeping the killer chorus of the original. While this is more atmospheric, I still think I prefer the Jay-Z original. 4 STARS

02. Alphabeat: Hole In My Heart (Video)
Alphabeat drop the sugary bubblegum sound that they used on Fascination and recent single The Spell for a more ’90s dance sound on the second single from album The Spell. I was a never a fan of their cheesy pop songs so I find this song…uh…bearable.

Hole In My Heart
03. Beyoncé: Fever (Video)
So much for Beyoncé taking a break. Alongside collaborations with Lady GaGa and Alicia Keys, Beyoncé finds time to release single Fever to promote her new perfume Heat. She makes a solid yet hardly groundbreaking cover of the 1956 smoky classic. I kind of want Beyoncé to disappear for a while at this stage especially as she’s planning on releasing a new album at the end of the day.


04. Chiddy Bang: The Opposite Of Adults (Video)
A delightful rap track that samples MGMT’s Kids. I think I agree with Curtains. This could well be better than the original. I’ll have to keep listening to find out. Definite party starting tune for sure!!!

Opposite Of Adults EP

05. Cobra Starship: Hot Mess (Video)
Pretty much like Metro Station’s
Shake It, the only thing that’s good about this song is the killer chorus. The rest of the song is forgettable and annoying. 2.5 STARS

File:CobraStarship HotMessSingleCover.jpg

06. Daisy Dares You featuring Chipmunk: Number One Enemy (Video)
Britain’s newest teenybopper popstar releases her first single. The video is like a low budget version of Gwen Stefani’s What You Waiting For? and there’s a whiff of Avril Lavigne about it. The song is catchy enough pop rock but what’s with the random Chipmunk verse. Completely pointless.

Number One Enemy

07. Ellie Goulding: Starry Eyed (Video)
A hook filled, hypnotic electropop track. I think Ellie is a deserved winner of the BRITS Critics Choice Award. I think she’s gonna be 2010’s big new star.

Starry Eyed

08. Giggs featuring B.o.B.: Don’t Go There (Video)
Expletive filled rap track by British/Jamacian rapper Giggs. This probably won’t get much airplay but it’s actually a really enjoyable rap track with a catchy enough chorus provided by American rapper B.o.B..

Don't Go There (Feat. B.o.B.)

09. Glee Cast: Bust A Move 3 STARS (Video)

Bust A Move (Glee Cast Version)

10. Glee Cast: Sweet Caroline 3.5 STARS (Video)

Sweet Caroline (Glee Cast Version)

11. Glee Cast: Thong Song 3 STARS (Video)

Thong Song (Glee Cast Version)

More fun yet cheesy, stage school style covers of songs by Young MC, Neil Diamond and Sisquo. Their Sweet Caroline rendition is good but the teacher who rules the Glee club really needs to stop rapping on the other two tracks. It’s the equivalent of watching your dad trying to act cool.

12. Groove Armada featuring SaintSaviour and Fenech-Soler: Paper Romance (Video)
First we had
Bad Romance, now we have Paper Romance. Groove Armada release another fantastic electronica track. Check out the dark video for the song too. Definitely made me excited for their new album Black Light out 1 March. 5 STARS

Paper Romance

13. Jason Derulo: In My Head (Video)
Okay, there are a million reasons I don’t like the video for this song. First of all, it’s a complete copy of Justin Timberlake’s Like I Love You video. I also don’t like how Jason is sitting in the carpark listening to his own song Whatcha Say. I mean talk about shameless product placement. And I don’t like how it seems that every song by Jason Derulo looks like its gonna start with “Jason Deruloooooo…Beluga Heights…J-J-J-J.R.”. As for the song itself, well it’s a catchy R&B tune over a rock backing track. Nothing special. Now that Chris Brown’s career is on a downer, have we got ourselves a more clean cut replacement.

In My Head

14. Jay Sean featuring Sean Paul and Lil’ John: Do You Remember (Video)
Jay Sean returns with another unoriginal R&B track designed especially for the American market. Not as bad as Down but this would be nothing without Sean Paul and Lil John and its clear aping of Chris Brown’s Forever.

Do You Remember

15. JLS: One Shot (Video)
Oh someone make these cheesy boybanders disappear. JLS release a gooey, cringeworthy ballad. As if that matters, the only reason they’re so popular is because they flash their abs in every video.

One Shot

16. Leona Lewis: I Got You (Video)
Poor old Leona. Things haven’t been looking so great seeing as she’s constantly criticised for her poor performance skills, getting punched in the face and suffering the sophomore slump with her new album Echo. I really like this song, it’s romantic, it has a catchy, melodic chorus and Leona’s voice is beautiful as usual. Hopefully, things will pick up for her with this song.

I Got You

17. Lil’ Wayne featuring Ludacris: Eat You Alive (Video)
I’ve never really understood Lil Wayne’s popularity. I think there’s something really vile about him. Don’t like this song at all. Sounds like Lady GaGa’s
Monster…from the Monster himself. 1 STAR

18. Lupe Fiasco: Lean (Video)
Why is Lupe so underrated? I think he’s up there with other rap greats like Jay-Z and Eminem. Lean is one of two promo singles he’s releasing.

19. Lupe Fiasco: Proceed (Video)
Second promo single by Lupe.Another fantastic rap track with brilliant lyrics. Again I ask: why isn’t Lupe more popular???

20. Muse: Resistance (Video)
Muse are just amazing. This track is just amazing! Before I get into incoherent babbling, everything Muse does is amazing! This is the another brilliant single from Muse’s The Resistance album!

File:Muse - Resistance.jpg

21. Nick Jonas & The Administration: Who I Am (Video)
Oh man! And I thought the Jonas Brothers were bad! When I heard that the baby of the family, Nick was working on a new musical side project, I actually held hope that something good would be produced. Hopes squashed. This is just horrible. Lyrically cliched, Nick sounds like he’s in pain everytime he sings. 1.5 STARS

22. Pitbull featuring Akon: Shut It Down (Video)
Oh great, my two favourite artists Pitbull and Akon team up for what’s sure to be yet another song of musical genius. *SARCASM AND A LOT OF IT* Doesn’t matter what I say about these sexist singers, this will be an automatic hit as it features Akon’s trademark whine, Pitbull’s incoherent babbling and a very ‘now’ production with Transformers style effects.

Shut It Down [Explicit]

23. Rihanna: Rude Boy (Video)
Not the best song from Rihanna’s rather brilliant Rated R but certainly the most commerical. After a lot of brooding and threatening, Rihanna finally has some fun with this slight dancehall tune about the act of lust, repetitive chorus and all.

24. Seamus Haji vs. Mark Knight and Funkagenda: Good Times (Video)
A remixed update on the 1979 Chic classic. Nothing special, something to dance too after a few drinks too many.

25. Snoop Dogg featuring Hustle Boyz: Check Yo Self (Snoop Dogg G-Mix) (Video)
Amongst the current stream of urban junk infiltrating the charts at the minute, its really refreshing to hear Snoop Doggy Dogg’s cover of Ice Cube’s fantastic 1993 West Coast hip hop song Check Yo Self. Good stuff.

26. Sugababes: Wear My Kiss (Video)
Sugababes tick all the right boxes in pop music with latest single Wear My Kiss. But for all its catchiness, this just sounds bland and lacks any soul. The Sugababes are pretty much dead to me now and it’s not cos Keisha left. It’s just in the last two years, the Sugababes have become a shadow of their former selves.

Wear My Kiss

27. Timbaland featuring Justin Timberlake: Carry Out (Video)
Anyone worried about Timbaland over-exposure needn’t worry. This is simply been released as a promo single so don’t expect it to be everywhere like the Katy Perry collaboration If We Ever Meet Again. Anyway, this track sees the continued bromance between Timbo and Justin. It’s a mid-tempo tune about meeting and doing inappropriate things to the ladies with heavy use of food metaphors. It’s fine but nothing we haven’t heard from these two before. 3 STARS

Carry Out

28. Young Money featuring Lloyd: Bedrock (Video)
All the biggest hip-hop stars from the Young Money label get together for this unoriginal yet strangely addictive track. Love the production on this song and all the rappers give a solid performance with Llyod’s soulful crooning on the chorus.